I don't know what to do

I am a college student in the south. Recently I've had some tough times, but as most people would say I brought it upon myself. In highschool I got caught with weed a few times and got kicked out of my first highschool for drinking on campus. I did a lot of different drugs in highschool but it was never enough to pose a problem with addiction. Except for oxy which I stopped before it got bad.
Next thing I knew it I was in college. I got caught with weed again and almost got kicked out of college. I got to stay but it effected me badly, and needing a drug of some sort, I attained a monthly prescription of adderall. Long story short, I became addicted to that and abused it heavily and daily for a long year and a half.
Finally, against all odds, God helped give me the strength to kick the addiction. I prayed one day for him to help me, and that if he was really there, then he would help me. He did. And it was a hard battle, but I dropped my adderall prescription and stopped buying more adderall from people all the time.
During my addiction I dated a girl who was a little older than me. She manipulated my addiction and mental problems due to my addiction, to manipulate me to stay with her even after she hooked up with so many guys she couldn't remember. Writing this makes me remember how painful all this was. Also, I was addicted to hydrocodone for a little over a month during the time of my adderall addiction. Constantly depressed due to an addiction and a horrible relationship, all I wanted to do was die. God saved me from that.
Move on to the next bit, which is this year, I have stopped being "addicted" to drugs, but I smoke weed several, several times a day, and recreationally use other drugs often enough I will usually a few different ones each week.
I'm tired of all this though. I'm tired of always getting high, I'm tired of partying on the weekends, I'm tired of society and people in general.
I know I use drugs because I feel empty, without a purpose, depressed and im sure theres more. The only thing that satisfies me that isn't a drug is God. I know that now, but I don't think I will ever be able live for God (or not be a druggie) if I fully devote my whole life to God, and i know that I won't be able to that if I am in college. There are too many distractions and temptations. I don't know what got wants me to do.

I'm sorry for the story of my life. I know its not that interesting, but please pray for me to find my way, and in the process get away from drugs. Thank you.

Dear Friend
Do not despair. There is hope in God.
He and only He, has the answers to your questions and the solution to your problems. He loves you with and everlasting love. He has a great future and hope for you. Regardless of the wintry past summer is near. We all have an enemy who wants to steal our peace, destroy our destiny and even kill us before our time. But we have a Friend in Jesus, Who came to give us peace with God and life that is super-abundant.

My counsel is for you to surrender to God fully and let Him have full control. He can and wants to wean you of the addiction problem. But you must make up yor mind to be addicted to Him instead.

Pray for guidance to a good Bible-believeing Church that can nurture you when you make your commitment. The company you keep is important ( 1Cor15:33). You need the company of believers who understand where you're coming from and help you to find your feet in Christ. It will not be over-night. It will be a process, but you have to hold on, study the word, saturate yor mind with it, meditate on in day and night until you begin to do it and reap its benefits. (Ps1:1-3, Josh1:

When we are at the end of ourselves, we are ready for God to begin.

Charles H. Spurgeon

“We would see Jesus.”

John 12:21

Evermore the worldling's cry is, “Who will show us any good?” He seeks satisfaction in earthly comforts, enjoyments, and riches. But the quickened sinner knows of only one good. “O that I knew where I might find Him !” When he is truly awakened to feel his guilt, if you could pour the gold of India at his feet, he would say, “Take it away: I want to find Him .” It is a blessed thing for a man, when he has brought his desires into a focus, so that they all centre in one object. When he has fifty different desires, his heart resembles a mere of stagnant water, spread out into a marsh, breeding miasma and pestilence; but when all his desires are brought into one channel, his heart becomes like a river of pure water, running swiftly to fertilize the fields. Happy is he who hath one desire, if that one desire be set on Christ, though it may not yet have been realized. If Jesus be a soul's desire, it is a blessed sign of divine work within. Such a man will never be content with mere ordinances. He will say, “I want Christ; I must have him—mere ordinances are of no use to me; I want himself; do not offer me these; you offer me the empty pitcher, while I am dying of thirst; give me water, or I die. Jesus is my soul's desire. I would see Jesus!”

Is this thy condition, my reader, at this moment? Hast thou but one desire, and is that after Christ? Then thou art not far from the kingdom of heaven. Hast thou but one wish in thy heart, and that one wish that thou mayst be washed from all thy sins in Jesus’ blood? Canst thou really say, “I would give all I have to be a Christian; I would give up everything I have and hope for, if I might but feel that I have an interest in Christ?” Then, despite all thy fears, be of good cheer, the Lord loveth thee, and thou shalt come out into daylight soon, and rejoice in the liberty wherewith Christ makes men free.

Changing your thinking...
https://christian-talk.forumotion.com/t6043-change-requires-new-thinking#11400