Love you to death

These days sacred institution of marriages have become a joke. I will not talk about people, who live as partners. I recently, met a woman, who put a question to me when I told her that divorce is a sin.

Question

I do not know what to follow. Shall I follow God of Old Testament, who allowed divorce or shall I follow God who told us not to divorce in the New Testament? - I think that Jesus talked to Pharisees and Jews and not to the Christians

Isn't this wonderful, we don't even read Bible, yet we are full scholars on the Bible and its laws. It is on our own will to reject and accept God. Without reading the Bible, we use our assumptions.

Here is the Law of Divorce from the Old Testament

"When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife" (Deut. 24:1.2).

Now let us look at the Law of Divorce that Jesus gave in the New Testament

It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce. But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adultress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery (Mathew 5:31-32)

Did Jesus give a new law of divorce and remarriage? Absolutely not! The Law in the Book of Deuteronomy, clearly says that she find no favor in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleaness in her and the Law in the New Testament says the similar thing except for marital unfaithfulness. Divorce is only considered in the extreme case of marital unfaithfulness.

However, when we say the Lord's Prayer, we ask God to forgive our sins the way we forgive sins of others. I believe that we must forgive each other for mistakes.

Both laws in the Old Testament and New Testament are same because both are given by Jesus Christ Himself. How can Jesus contradict or go back on His words?

I would urge all the people who are married, to take your vows, that you have made in the presence of God. You did not make promises to each other but you made promises to God. If you break them, then, you disregard, God's authority over your lives.

God bless all.

Sorry I missed this wonderful post. All the people who want to get married must go through this post. Out of lust they marry and then throw their kids on the streets. I have many teenage couples doing so. People simply cannot hold on to their committment. Daniel tell me, how long have you been married and how may kids do you have. Your wife must be very lucky to have you in her life.

I agree that people have made fun of marriage that is holy to God. People just cannot keep up thier promises they made to God, while getting married. When I see young single parent mothers my heart just saddens for the child they are carrying. What type of mothers they would become who out of sexual pleasure left their husbands and same goes for the male parents. What will happen to the future of our country who will be run by these kids who had no love from eith of their parent?

God bless all

Top Reasons for Divorce

1. Money - They say money makes the world go around. But they also say it is the root to all evils.
   
2. Infidelity
   
3. Poor communication
   
4. Change in priorities
   
5. Lack of commitment to marriage
   
6. sexual problems
   
7. Addictions
   
8. Failed expectations of your spouse
   
9. Physical, emotional or sexual abuse

Source: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/35097/top_reasons_people_divorce.html

Top Ten Myths for Divorce

1 Because people learn from their bad experiences, second marriages tend to be more successful than first marriages. Although many people who divorce have successful subsequent marriages, the divorce rate of remarriages is in fact higher than that of first marriages.

2 Living together before marriage is a good way to reduce the chances of eventually divorcing.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have a considerably higher chance of eventually divorcing. The reasons for this are not well understood. In part, the type of people who are willing to cohabit may also be those who are more willing to divorce. There is some evidence that the act of cohabitation itself generates attitudes in people that are more conducive to divorce, for example the attitude that relationships are temporary and easily can be ended.

3 Divorce may cause problems for many of the children who are affected by it, but by and large these problems are not long lasting and the children recover relatively quickly.
Divorce increases the risk of interpersonal problems in children. There is evidence, both from small qualitative studies and from large-scale, long-term empirical studies, that many of these problems are long lasting. In fact, they may even become worse in adulthood.

4 Having a child together will help a couple to improve their marital satisfaction and prevent a divorce.
Many studies have shown that the most stressful time in a marriage is after the first child is born. Couples who have a child together have a slightly decreased risk of divorce compared to couples without children, but the decreased risk is far less than it used to be when parents with marital problems were more likely to stay together “for the sake of the children.”

5 Following divorce, the woman’s standard of living plummets by seventy three percent while that of the man’s improves by forty two percent.
This dramatic inequity, one of the most widely publicized statistics from the social sciences, was later found to be based on a faulty calculation. A reanalysis of the data determined that the woman’s loss was twenty seven percent while the man’s gain was ten percent. Irrespective of the magnitude of the differences, the gender gap is real and seems not to have narrowed much in recent decades.

6 When parents don’t get along, children are better off if their parents divorce than if they stay together.
A recent large-scale, long-term study suggests otherwise. While it found that parents’ marital unhappiness and discord have a broad negative impact on virtually every dimension of their children’s well-being, so does the fact of going through a divorce. In examining the negative impacts on children more closely, the study discovered that it was only the children in very high conflict homes who benefited from the conflict removal that divorce may bring. In lower-conflict marriages that end in divorce—and the study found that perhaps as many as two thirds of the divorces were of this type—the situation of the children was made much worse following a divorce. Based on the findings of this study, therefore, except in the minority of high-conflict marriages it is better for the children if their parents stay together and work out their problems than if they divorce.

7 Because they are more cautious in entering marital relationships and also have a strong determination to avoid the possibility of divorce, children who grow up in a home broken by divorce tend to have as much success in their own marriages as those from intact homes.
Marriages of the children of divorce actually have a much higher rate of divorce than the marriages of children from intact families. A major reason for this, according to a recent study, is that children learn about marital commitment or permanence by observing their parents. In the children of divorce, the sense of commitment to a lifelong marriage has been undermined.

8 Following divorce, the children involved are better off in stepfamilies than in single-parent families.
The evidence suggests that stepfamilies are no improvement over single-parent families, even though typically income levels are higher and there is a father figure in the home. Stepfamilies tend to have their own set of problems, including interpersonal conflicts with new parent figures and a very high risk of family breakup.

9 Being very unhappy at certain points in a marriage is a good sign that the marriage will eventually end in divorce.
All marriages have their ups and downs. Recent research using a large national sample found that eighty six percent of people who were unhappily married in the late 1980s, and stayed with the marriage, indicated when interviewed five years later that they were happier. Indeed, three fifths of the formerly unhappily married couples rated their marriages as either “very happy” or “quite happy.”

10 It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings
Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. For example, in most states women have a good chance of receiving custody of their children. Because women more strongly want to keep their children with them, in states where there is a presumption of shared custody with the husband the percentage of women who initiate divorces is much lower. Also, the higher rate of women initiators is probably due to the fact that men are more likely to be "badly behaved." Husbands, for example, are more likely than wives to have problems with drinking, drug abuse, and infidelity.

Source: http://marriage.rutgers.edu/Publications/pubtoptenmyths.htm

Wow - some really cool stats you have got there from internet. I liked to read about the myth part and the most interesting myth is the first one. I wonder if someone learns after the marrying three times or four times or five times or even remain in the learning process after many many failed marriages. I remember one poem here.

King Solomon and King David led merry merry lives
with many lady friends and many many wives
but when old age crept over them
King Solomon wrote Proverbs and King David wrote the Psalms

God bless all for contributing some interesting posts